July212014
ima-mischief-causin-sherlockian:

thedevilwearssammyonwednesdays:

jonnovstheinternet:

imnotarealfuckingpirate:


After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Sainsbury’s. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Sainsbury’s…
Dear Mrs. Harris,Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are “documented by our videosurveillance cameras”:1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an officialvoice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of Maltesers.6. August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION - WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children obliged.8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he begancrying and screamed, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’
Emergency Medics were called.9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.10. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudlyhumming the ’ Mission Impossible’ theme.11. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his ‘Madonna look’ by using different sizes of funnels.12. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsedthrough, yelled ‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’13. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed ‘OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!’14. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.And last, but not least:15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waitedawhile, and then yelled very loudly, ‘Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here.’
One of the Staff passed out.

OMFG I AM SCREAMING.

So good

“Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.”
Is this woman’s husband Misha Collins?

OMG THIS IS GREAT

ima-mischief-causin-sherlockian:

thedevilwearssammyonwednesdays:

jonnovstheinternet:

imnotarealfuckingpirate:

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Sainsbury’s. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Sainsbury’s…


Dear Mrs. Harris,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are “documented by our video
surveillance cameras”:

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of Maltesers.

6. August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION - WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’

Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ’ Mission Impossible’ theme.

11. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his ‘Madonna look’ by using different sizes of funnels.

12. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled ‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’

13. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed ‘OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!’

14. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, ‘Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here.’


One of the Staff passed out.

OMFG I AM SCREAMING.

So good

“Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.”

Is this woman’s husband Misha Collins?

OMG THIS IS GREAT

(Source: youknowyourebritishwhen, via jamesbarnessexual)

12PM

raqe:

I was going to get mad at everyone in my art class for wasting expensive paint but then I got distracted by how pretty it was

(via jamesbarnessexual)

11AM
amoying:

geekylittlecephalopod:

reblogalert:

boneycircus:


Nicholas Lord, a Navy sailor since 2008 currently on active duty, is under investigation after threatening to rape a young woman who is a Navy recruit.
The young woman posted a photo of herself on Facebook, captioning it to say she’s proud of how she’s working hard to get in shape for the Navy, and she’s excited to be leaving soon. The photo was shared on the page for her Delayed Entry Program for her fellow Navy recruits.
Nicholas Lord, who is not a current recruit and who has been serving in the Navy since 2008, then commented:
You’ll end up pregnant real soon you fucking wh***. If I could and I knew you, I’d hold you down and rape you.
The next day, Lord gloated about his threat on his Facebook page, updating his status to say he’d been “trolling feminist pages.” In case it needs to be said, the Facebook page for a Navy program is not a “feminist page.” It’s a Navy recruiting page. (x) (x)
I don’t know what the Navy’s punishment system is like, but I hope he gets the worst possible. I hope they investigate his past history in the military, too. If he’s bold enough to outright threaten female recruits, under his own name, on public, Navy-run social media, I seriously doubt he hasn’t harassed and threatened female sailors. He may even have raped them.
Especially given the military’s problem with letting men get away with harassment and rape, they need to severely punish him.

Send it viral, and he will see ramifications.

If you only reblog one thing today I hope it’s this.

Reblogging for signal boost, and to add TW

how can a fully functioning navy sailor still use such imbecile language that would be typically used among premature 12 year old boys and idiotic misogynistic mras

amoying:

geekylittlecephalopod:

reblogalert:

boneycircus:

Nicholas Lord, a Navy sailor since 2008 currently on active duty, is under investigation after threatening to rape a young woman who is a Navy recruit.

The young woman posted a photo of herself on Facebook, captioning it to say she’s proud of how she’s working hard to get in shape for the Navy, and she’s excited to be leaving soon. The photo was shared on the page for her Delayed Entry Program for her fellow Navy recruits.

Nicholas Lord, who is not a current recruit and who has been serving in the Navy since 2008, then commented:

You’ll end up pregnant real soon you fucking wh***. If I could and I knew you, I’d hold you down and rape you.

The next day, Lord gloated about his threat on his Facebook page, updating his status to say he’d been “trolling feminist pages.” In case it needs to be said, the Facebook page for a Navy program is not a “feminist page.” It’s a Navy recruiting page. (x) (x)

I don’t know what the Navy’s punishment system is like, but I hope he gets the worst possible. I hope they investigate his past history in the military, too. If he’s bold enough to outright threaten female recruits, under his own name, on public, Navy-run social media, I seriously doubt he hasn’t harassed and threatened female sailors. He may even have raped them.

Especially given the military’s problem with letting men get away with harassment and rape, they need to severely punish him.

Send it viral, and he will see ramifications.

If you only reblog one thing today I hope it’s this.

Reblogging for signal boost, and to add TW

how can a fully functioning navy sailor still use such imbecile language that would be typically used among premature 12 year old boys and idiotic misogynistic mras

(Source: facebooksexism, via i-was-so-alone-i-owe-you-so-much)

11AM
fromseatoshiningsea1:

devilsfavoritestraightedgedemon:

ask-gallows-callibrator:

iamladyloki:

abucketfullofjoy:

meditategravitate:

i didn’t know there were 400k vegans on this site?

You don’t have to be a vegan to be against animal cruelty

^

^^^

This includes Dogfighting and Pit-Bull abuse!

Forever against!!

fromseatoshiningsea1:

devilsfavoritestraightedgedemon:

ask-gallows-callibrator:

iamladyloki:

abucketfullofjoy:

meditategravitate:

i didn’t know there were 400k vegans on this site?

You don’t have to be a vegan to be against animal cruelty

^

^^^

This includes Dogfighting and Pit-Bull abuse!

Forever against!!

(Source: fuckyeahwizardryy, via funnywildlife)

11AM

always-b-e-strong:

roqueofspades:

the-blog-of-a-nerdy-fangirl:

This is the cutest thing to ever exist ever. Everyone else go home this is the winner

WHY IS THIS SO FLIPDOODLING CUTE

This is so funny!! Made my day!! :D

(Source: hugs-sweets, via jamesbarnessexual)

7AM
July202014

fandomsdevouredmysoul:

i-fell-into-a-sarchasm:

SUPERNATURAL FANDOM EXPERIMENT!

Reblog if you DON’T hate Sam Winchester.

image

(via anunexpectedhotdwarf)

4PM

cruelbritannia:

I love that you can clearly see Evans go “SHIT” and Stan go “WOW” and Scarlett definitely reacts, but then plays it off like it’s no big deal. 

(Source: bbuchanann, via i-was-so-alone-i-owe-you-so-much)

8AM
a-gradual-decompression:

weallheartonedirection:

"Firstly, I’m glad you survived. I don’t know how you can stand all that water. Secondly, come here. You washed off my scent."

accurate caption is accurate

a-gradual-decompression:

weallheartonedirection:

"Firstly, I’m glad you survived. I don’t know how you can stand all that water. Secondly, come here. You washed off my scent."

accurate caption is accurate

(via schwarzwaelder-kirschtorte)

July192014

lstvn:

it looks like the beginning of a fanfic rated NC 21 

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